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OMG!!!! Some1 help me!!! [Apr. 13th, 2006|06:36 pm]
[Emotinal State |crushedwhy me?]
[My music..!!! |System Of A Down- Revenga]

Omg! I can't go to school monday!! There this guy Skyler at school, he keeps sexually harassing me!! I don't know why, but I'm so scared of him now. I don't want to go to school!! *cries* Maybe I'm just over reacting..? Maybe he's just a normal pervy teen..? I fucking hope so.
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I am me [Apr. 9th, 2006|11:09 pm]
[Emotinal State |hyperhyper]
[My music..!!! |Mr. Brightside- The Killers]


I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.

I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.

We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.

I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.

I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.

We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.

I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.

I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.

I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.

I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.

I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.

I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didn’t have to always deal with society hating me.

I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.

I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.

I am the woman who loves her "son" even though I only had three daughters,I am the woman who will be proud to welcome my "daughter in law" into our family legaly when they marry next year.

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.... [Apr. 6th, 2006|04:05 pm]
[Emotinal State |blankblank]
[My music..!!! |Love Song- Korn]

I haven't posted in a LONNNGGG time.A lot has happened. None of which I want to talk about. So I'll talk about what's going on now.

I'm so ashamed of who I am. I cut... yesterday, not bad.. pussy cuts actually. I'm dead inside.. numb, cold... There's nothing left now. I'm just a hallow shell.
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(no subject) [Mar. 28th, 2006|12:43 pm]
[Emotinal State |exanimateinsane... i wish i was dead]

Well, I'm still stressed about this Bush thing. I really don't know what I could POSSIBLY say to Bush in a letter that might possibly change his mind!! *sigh* Allyson is going to help also:D. She's either going to send an e-mail, write a letter, or start a protest. So yeah, at least she's supporting. Oh, and one of Brittney's friends is going to help with our protest.

I just noticed, how come Brittney was never this caring about me? God, I'm so selfish, a... my friend might be sent back to mexico, and I'm complaining about Brittney not caring this much about me?!!! ERRRG *hits head on wall*. Stupid. I'm stupid.

Anyway, we're not going to do anything untill after the 4th, so that way maybe I could get some of the people at the group to help.

Okay, but seriously, lets get down to the other things that are buggin me, shall we? Well, I cut last night.. and burned. The burns are that bad, i wrote "scars. don't. fade." But you can hardly read it. I'm thinkin of doing them again. Bleh, I'm such a failure.

As for the group thing though, I'm so scared!! I feel the extreme need to prove myself worthy of being there. But as the quote says, "Id much rather to be hated for who I am than loved for who Im not."

I love that quote, haven't a clue who said it though lol.

But yeah, I fel like total shit. I'm tempted to text Terri, get a bit of support, but I don't know what to say. I just freaking wish some random person would break into my house and just... smash my skull in!!! Or do something, kill me slowly... very slowly and painfully. Ugh, STUPID FREAKING IMAGES!! I wish they'd just leave.
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BUSH!!! [Mar. 27th, 2006|10:59 pm]
[Emotinal State |aggravatedstupid bush]
[My music..!!! |iunno.. sumin..]

Okay, so I guess bush is trying to pass a law about illegal immigrants. Basically, he's sendin 'em back to mexico:|. Which is total bull!! It's completely unfair to send some1 back to mexico when they've been here for most of their lives!! It's complete bull. Land of the free?? *hack*

So yeah, I'm sendin Mr. GWB a letter. Not that'll do much good, but it's worth a try. PLease support me??... eh.
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Iunno [Mar. 25th, 2006|09:04 am]
[Emotinal State |coldits freezing]
[My music..!!! |my stomach growling]

I feel like crap. I'm.. not even going to say it. Bleh. My stomach keeps growling, I'm just wondering if Brittney, or anyone for that matter, notices.

Now I'm REALLY scared to go to that group, and see my therapist. *sigh* I bring it upon myself though, correct? Correct.

Something that really annoys me though, is Brittney and her rebel stage. *sigh* Wether she accepts it or not, she's throwing away her life, and it's kind of sad. I keep, trying and trying, but it's the same ol' bullshit. I don't really wanna get into that though.

I'm so freaking tired. I need to stay up though. I don't know why.. but I do, lol. I Gotta take a shower, find a little something to eat, try to stay awake, and... I guess try not to cut. Iunno, who knows? Wish me luck! Peace *huggers*
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hehehehe [Mar. 24th, 2006|07:42 pm]
[Emotinal State |aggravatedaggravated]
[My music..!!! |Twisted Transistor- Korn]


Bleh, I prolly just jinxed it!! damn it!!
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